H & R Writers Block

"Tell my brother I tried to write and
Put pen to paper but I was frightened
I couldn't seem to get the words out right
Right, quite right"


Thin Lizzy-"Got To Give it Up


Welcome to H & R Writers Block.

Yeah, I feel ya, kitty!

It's a place where all who try to come up with a good story or a good journal entry eventually end up once they are exhausted of inspirations. There is no handling fee and no service charge. For the writer, it is Purgatory, stuck in a limbo world of no ideas and ideas that you do not want to share.


Writing about my childhood took every bit of my heart and soul. It wiped me clean of inspiration.


Yet, I felt it needed to be done.


I have hid most of my childhood thoughts and recollections from my friends and family for at least 19 years. I was trying to make a clean break from my past and run away from it, because my childhood feels like it was lived by a completely different person. I wanted to hide away from it. I didn't want anyone to know the bullied and ridiculed person I used to be. For all intents and purposes, the years 1976 to 1994 were to not exist.

Yet now, thanks to a brilliant therapist and keeping in contact with the first friend I ever had, I have revisited the past. It needed to be done. Deep down inside, I am still that same kid. I still have a lot of those same dreams. I no longer wish that I did not go through the past. Everything happened for a reason, and those reasons helped shape me into the man I am today for better or for worse.

Shut up and take my money!

I wish I could dive more in depth into them with all of you, but I am not comfortable with that yet. I've shared things in therapy that I will not even share with my own family of things that happened all those years ago. First, I have to recover. A goal of 2018 is to come to terms with my past and all that happened. Slowly, but surely, this is happening.


As for now though, I have nothing more to say until the sweet scent of inspiration captures my nostrils.